Fear of Love Dissolved

Feelings of abandonment, rejection, and neglect are not always skin deep; sometimes fears stretch lifetimes in depth. Receiving love seems like it should be a given; it is, afterall, our God-given right but not everyone is able and of those who are not, hardly any understand why. It is complicated or at least that is the illusion we are fed. Answers in our childhood may offer clues but often one must dig much further to discover the full truth. In my experience the only way to do that is to look within because all of the answers are there waiting to be found again.

In creating our own worlds, we often choose what is familiar to us. We weave our stories out of the same cloth that we have chosen time and time again until we are ready to fabricate a story from better, higher quality cloth. And, as the saying goes, "When the student is ready, the master will appear."

She searched and searched for answers she thought would never come but quitting was not an option, somehow she knew her life depended on it. Every day she would search her inner worlds for the truth she had hidden from herself until quite suddenly the light began to shine upon it. Black and white images flashed before the screen of her mind like old movies playing upon an old-fashioned reel, the click clicking sounding in her ears as each image passed by.

The Master held her hand as the sobbing wracked her body and tears poured from her eyes. Together they observed one scenario after another as love unrequited left her feeling alone and deserted in lifetime after lifetime. All the hurt and pain like big crusty mounds crumbled off of her, and she could start to feel the weight of it lifting immediately. What seemed like an eternity later, it was over.

Holding her tightly the Master whispered, "It is over now. You are free to love and be loved. Nothing more stands in your way." Again she wept but now her tears were no longer of sorrow but of happiness and joy.

As he turned to part, he faced her once more. "Follow your heart. Trust me and trust yourself. You are free!" She realized her whole life story had been based upon these fears. She felt like a prisoner who had been set free from her past, and it had taken a journey to the temple within herself to discover the key she had carried all along.

Life is yours for the taking! If it is not what you want, it is within your power alone to change it.

The Paradox

Standing on the beach, the warm rays of the sun permeating my being, listening to the cry of the seagulls as they descend and ascend from the water, and watching the tide crash at my feet fills my heart with love. There's just something about running playfully into the invigorating embrace of the waves that is sure to make your heart unlock its doors and the child in you reappear, wide-eyed in awe of its greatness.

Diving into its depths, curious to know the treasures it shelters, my body tingles with renewal and strength. Giggles rise up out of me like bubbly champagne, tickling my insides, calling me to remember my joyous self. The sun kisses my face as I direct my attention into the light, drawing its energy into me, and then swimming deeper, further. Content I allow myself to float upward, eyes observing the small, twinkling spots of illuminations widening as I reach the surface. I taste the salt upon my lips as I exhale and then inhale again the pureness of the ocean air.

Energy delightfully spent, I return to the heated grains of sand and throw myself upon it, permitting my body to sink into the hot granules of gold. I surrender myself to the dreams of mermaids and the water nymphs and like a toddler who has played hard, sleep comes quickly so I can continue my respite in other worlds not far from here.

The Dream Master appears with a smile upon his face and a twinkle in his eyes to escort me to places unknown. For a brief moment I hesitate, and I feel an impression upon my mind, "Trust me" coaxing me out of my shell and with that we take flight. The earthly world seems to disappear beneath us. Bright and brighter lights envelop us while melodious sounds increase in volume until they are no longer heard outside of us but become an internal orchestra. Within it I discover we are the Light. We are the Sound. It encompasses everything and yet nothing at all. Love is and is not. The paradox is lost upon the human mind but here it all makes sense because there is nothing to make sense of.